Oils on stretched canvas 16 X 20

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Albums: Workshop 2

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Comment by Lorri Costan Roberts on October 8, 2011 at 13:59
Great effort and what a learning curve for us with R's critique...Thanks so much.I am a bit slow in getting mine done as I have a busy month in October(2 exhibitions to have paintings for) so I am a bit stretched for time but hope to achieve one even if it is in pastel or watercolour.Happy painting everyone.
Comment by Hazel Persson on October 7, 2011 at 15:50
Thanks so much for your critique Richard. I'm away from home at present so relying on dial-up  via my cellphone but will study it in depth when I get home tomorrow evening.
Comment by Xiao Li on October 7, 2011 at 2:37
Wow!  How did you do that Richard? Such a magic touch! again!!!  All I can say is Wow!! I am speechless!  I really want to learn that touch!!
Comment by Marlene Ford on October 7, 2011 at 0:38
All I can say is wow!  I learned so much from this critique.  Even more important to me is that I am learning to see things artistically.  I am a newbie at this...old too  haha.  Learning composition, and how to see I find my most challenging in this endeavor.  Thank you Richard and to Hazel too....I think the hardest for all of us is to submit ourselves to the critique....you are all wonderful!
Comment by Casey Toussaint on October 6, 2011 at 19:04
I like your composition - it occurs to me that my preliminary drawings were sort of copying your design.  I'll change that!
Comment by Richard Robinson on October 6, 2011 at 18:31

Hi Hazel thanks for your painting. Here's a wee critique for you…



Very nice idea and design Hazel! I like the placement of the figure and the meandering stream leading you in. I think your big tree is a little too close to the right edge of the painting for such a major player.



The big problem for me in this painting is too much bright green! The greens in the distance need to be subdued (grayed a little) and some larger muted shadows added to give them more convincing form. Where is the light coming from? That's the big question when you're trying to paint form. I would also warm the greens in the foreground to help add depth and variation. The warm cliff face in the distance is jumping forward spoiling the illusion of depth and might look better subdued into cool grays. Doing that and lightening it a little also helps to avoid that valley being so symmetrical. I find a slightly grayer sky is often preferable to a clear blue sky in a painting which seems to jump forward a little. Nice to see you playing with adding warm pinks into your clouds there but remember that color light should also apply to the snow at the same height.




You're a bit of a dabber Hazel! This shows to me a lack of confidence which can be gained only with practice unfortunately, but also by making yourself use larger brushes and a palette knife. It's also a good idea to practice painting individual elements on scrap paper/canvas before you apply them to your painting, focusing on painting the simple shadow and light shapes with the least possible fuss. With that said, you do however have a nice variety of hard and soft edges and different types of paint application which makes for an interesting paint surface.



The perspective of the stream and the rocks in it is a little off, making the river run uphill and down. The straight lines of the stream edge are also a little too man made - needs some bigger variation in there.


Overall I think with the exception of those bright greens (but that's a personal dislike of mine) it's a pleasing painting with a nice feeling to it and a lot of promise to be even better.

I've made a few changes in photoshop to illustrate some of my points (click for a larger image):



Comment by susie gregory on October 5, 2011 at 10:10

hazel..this has a real rain forest feel to me...that river is very enticing...i'm dying to follow it to see where it goes!!! susie


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