WIP Irupana, Bolivia (HELP!)

This is an UNFINISHED painting I am working on for somebody. I REALLY need some additional sets of eyes, before I finish it. I have to do the tile roof, which will probably go more gray-brown, and add the leaves on the tree to the left and the trees in the alley.

PLEASE critique this...I have to give it to the client--he is getting antsy and asking me about it every day. Do you see anything I should do BEFORE I go to the roof and leaves? I can edit too much out of it, because it's a picture of a dilapidated building that once stood in the plaza of his Bolivian village-hometown. Apparently the building recently collapsed and he wants a picture of home to remind him of his youth.

But other than that, I can change lots of things. So please feel free to RIP INTO THIS. I want it to be great, because there is more business where this request came from! ;-)

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Comment by Betsy Jenkins on June 20, 2013 at 12:02: Thanks, Silvana. I will be more knowledgeable when I see my "patron."

Comment by Silvana M Albano on June 20, 2013 at 8:55: Betsy, they are Bolivian natives (the Cholitas I mean). They generally wear long skirts and those hats, they have long black hair, which is often braided. The are often seen with those heavy bags, and they carry their children in the same way, with a tough resistant shawl across their back. They are typical Bolivian. They can wear upto 5 skirts or underskirts at the same time, that is why they look so 'wide'. Their skirts are always very colourful. There are a lot of them in my country and they generally sit at the corners of the blocks and sell spices, though nowadays they sell whatever...

Comment by Betsy Jenkins on June 20, 2013 at 8:35: Thanks, Ann! I agree with your analysis. I am stuck with most of the composition, because the client wanted everything in the photo...including the blue trash can? On the left and the building/roof line on the right. I think he lived in one of those buildings on the right. As for the figures, he wanted them..they are called Cholitas (not sure what that means), but those hats and colors are somewhat of a national costume. I should have put them closer together or left one out, as you suggested. I lapsed into symmetry with the trash can, because it was subconsciously bugging me. I have since this post darkened the shadows under the pporches, on the right side of the building and under the figures. I did this with several glazes of pPaynes gray mixed with Portland gray dark and copious amounts of liquin. This is because I, myself, was confused about the light source working from that crappy picture. I tried to make it a sunny day, but my values got all screwed up, because I am not quite knowledgeable enough to edit like that. As for texture, I assume you are talking about more impasto like brushwork. Good point. I am not sure the client was looking to feel the delapidation, though. I think he is more focused on the memory of this building in his youth vs. The delapidation. Not sure iI am skilled enough to render those aged walls, but its a goal to strive for, so thanks for pointing this out. I will look at the discussion on cedar keys more closely. I have been vEryVery busy with some business trips and then this painting lately. IveI've been away from the board and have missed this months assignment. Hope to settle back down next week. Thanks again for all your help.

Comment by Ann Turner on June 20, 2013 at 6:14: See Sharon Ripple photo of Cedar Keys revised. Michael gave her suggestions for adding dimension with light. It is a great example of what I am trying to say. Its on the same row of posts but 2 from your post.

Comment by Ann Turner on June 20, 2013 at 5:47: I think that this subject needs some more texture. The building is old and falling down but your painting style is smooth and calm. It looks crookedy but the feeling of dilapidation needs to be pushed to get the emotion across that your client wants. I would also like to talk about composition. It maybe too late to change these but I think it would improve the over all effect. You have 2 figures that are clones of each other I would leave the one that touches the building with her head because it helps move the eye from the building to the distance and get rid of the other. The small blue thing in the left foreground is distracting bringing th viewer forward to the dark area where there isn't much interest. The same with the roof line of the next building that takes the viewer up and out of the painting with that dark shape and light string. i'm confused about the light source make it more obvious to give the building more dimension. Hope this helps. It is an interesting subject, good luck with it and a wish you many commissions.

Comment by Betsy Jenkins on June 19, 2013 at 14:12: Yes! This is the picture that he gave me!

I will add some bright orangey-white tones to the timber posts, where the light hits them. I wanted to add some atmospheric perspective to the far buildings, but not sure how to gray down yellows, without making mud by adding violet, r without turning them blue/green. I left them hazy and light, because the leaves will cover much of it anyway.

Thanks again for all your help, Silvana.

Comment by Silvana M Albano on June 19, 2013 at 13:28: Is this the picture? I think yourpainting is wonderful!!! And that roof IS so bent... I think you could make those timber posts a bit lighter, and apply some of that atmospheric perspective we have been learning down the road.... But they are just suggestions!

Comment by Betsy Jenkins on June 19, 2013 at 13:10: Hi, Silvana,

Thanks for your comments. It's 11x14". Oil on canvas.The roof on top is NOT straight. The building is quite dilapidated and collapsed shortly after the picture was taken. You can see the timbers holding it up on the second floor. And there's a sheet of plastic on the upper floor to the right. My husband says it looks more like corrugated metal in my painting. I am not sure how to make it look more like plastic. There are also sheets of metal on the roof, which were nailed in to cover holes/leaks. (Why this guy wants a picture of this catastrophe is beyond me! Go figure!)

I was working from a very crappy photo, that is really blown out in the lights and way too dark in the darks. It seemed like the posts in the front are set into some kind of concrete footers. I tried to copy them to the best of my ability. I suppose I can revisit them. I will definitely straighten out the line on the right edge of the roof. I was planning on putting a little more modulation in the sky color, maybe some faint yellows and lighter as we get closer to the far rooftops.

Thanks again so much! Every little bit helps. My husband is not an artist, and he tries to help me as much as he can. But it's great to have your more trained eye. Thanks!

Comment by Silvana M Albano on June 19, 2013 at 12:24: Well Betsy, I think you are doing a great job, but that won't help you much, will it...? What I don't really understand is those oblique like posts on the 1st floor, and the roof, at the right of the building is not really straight, perhaps that is the effect you want to give it? By the way, wat size is it?